Peyton Manning. Thank You.
Thank you for Omaha! Omaha!
Thank you for replacing any Kardashian as top celebrity endorser. Your most recent commercial for Frito Lay with David Beckham begs the question: Is it soccer or football?
Here’s a more important question: Why in the world doesn’t the U.S., which is posed to make it to the World Cup Round of 16, not have a true national training center for its men’s and women’s soccer teams? The U.S. just fought soccer paper tiger, uh, world power England to a 0-0 tie.
A win over Iran on Tuesday and U.S. sports fans just might have to ask, football or soccer?
The U.S. finally has the talent and depth to compete, but it can’t be expected to win at the highest level without an elite nationally training facility the likes of France and Italy, which have the best in the world.
Therefore, The Loser pledges an unspecified amount for every win he posts over .500 in his picks to the construction of a national soccer, uh, football training facility. Maybe Frito Lay and the Mannings and even the NFL will consider kicking in a few sheckles.
Clemson University is famous for its IPTAY – I Pay Ten A Year – fundraising program. Imagine if every U.S. soccer fan kicked in whatever he or could. If You Build it, They Will Kick.
Now, back to soccer, uh, football.
PANTHERS -1 over Broncos – In this week’s Wheel of QB, Sam Darnold starts for Panthers against the worst offense in the NFL. Listening to Russell Wilson’s weekly proclamations that the Broncos are about to explode is like listening to election deniers.
BROWNS +3.5 over Bucs – In his last audition to be a starting QB in the NFL, Jacoby Brissett asks, “What can Tom Brady to that I can’t?” The answer: miss practices on Wednesdays.
Ravens -4.5 over JAGUARS – The Roquan Smith Effect: Ravens defense developing into a dominant unit. Jaguars fans thrilled they drafted Trevor Lawrence instead of Zach Wilson.
DOLPHINS -13 over Texans – Fantasy Football Alert: Play Miami defense against Texans team starting Kyle Allen at QB. Play QB Tua Tagovailoa against Houston defense, 18th in scoring defense.
The Loser is taking the Fish giving a hefty 14.5 and Tyreek Hill and Tua Tagovailoa to each score a touchdown. We got +900 at BetMGM and wagered $20 meaning if the Dolphins win by 15 or more and both Tagovailoa and Hill score a touchdown, the payoff is $200, meaning we net $180.
Bears +6 over JETS – Obviously a lot depends on the health of Justin Fields (AC joint). The Jets face the most pivotal moment in second-year coach Robert Salah’s tenure. He has benched Zach Wilson in favor of Mike White. It’s not just the right move, it’s the only move. He won’t lose the team, but the Jets suddenly might have to acknowledge they didn’t find their franchise QB in the 2021 draft. Ugh.
TITANS +2.5 over Bengals – Loser fans know what a fan of Derrick “King Henry” Henry the Loser is. Ditto Titans coach Mike Vrabel. You give The Loser the Titans at home getting points on a rainy Sunday and it’s a no-brainer. 👑👑👑
COMMANDERS -4 over Falcons – He is NOT a franchise quarterback but his is franchise favorite. He is Hoosier. Get the reference? Pretty impressive what Ron Rivera has done in the insane asylum known as the Washington Football Team under warden Dan Snyder. Call this The Commanders Redemption.
Chargers -3 at CARDINALS – If the Cardinals don’t part ways with Kliff Kingsbury for losing QB Kyler Murray, how about this: Arizona fired assistant coach Sean Kugler for allegedly groping a woman in Mexico.
He’s the second Kingsbury assistant no longer with the team. Running backs coach James Saxon was sentenced to a year in jail (suspended) for assaulting a woman in May. Bad enough, right? The Cardinals kept him until the arrest became public in August. One Flew Over the Cardinals Nest. Cards are 1-5 at home.
+SEAHAWKS -3.5 over RAIDERS – A highly functional franchise and future Hall of Fame coach at home against a highly dysfunctional franchise with a future coaching flop and the line is only 3.5 Losers can be choosers.
+CHIEFS -15.5 over Rams – Perspective Check: The defending Super Bowl champs are getting 15.5 points. John Woolford starts for the Rams at QB. The way Matt Stafford (10 TDs; 8 Ints) is this an improvement? No.
49ERS -9.5 over Saints – Question: Who has the best defense in the NFL – San Fran, Dallas, Baltimore, Philly, NY Jets, Tampa Bay, Tennessee? 49ers on a three-game win streak and getting stronger (and healthier) every week.
EAGLES -6.5 over Packers – Most important game of the season to date for NFC champion contending Eagles. After a stunning home loss to the Commanders the Eagles needed a last-second field goal to win at Colts. Packers (1-4 away) are one more loss away from unofficially beginning plans for 2023.
Steelers +2.5 over COLTS – The Vince Lombardi Coaching Matchup of the Year: Mike Tomlin vs Jeff Saturday.
THANKSGIVING DAY Loser Lookback, we assess where it all went wrong.
(Last week’s “reasoning” in italics.)
COWBOYS -10 over Giants – Cowboys, 28-20. No, as proven in last week’s loss to the Lions, Daniel Jones is not the franchise quarterback of the future. Talk about a backdoor cover. Giants scores with eight seconds left
Bills -9.5 over LIONS – Bills, 28-25 The Loser built this three-legged parlay on BetMGM: Bills win, Williams scores 1 TD, and St. Brown will have more than 80.5 yards receiving. We got +650 and put down $20 for a payoff of $150, which means we would net $120. The Loser lost the pick but won the parlay as Bills won, Williams scored, and St. Brown had 122 yards receiving. Happy Turkey Day. 💰💰💰 🦃